Monday, February 11, 2013

I'd Hit That (Comment Button).

Hi Friends.

Today, I was hit on.  Rather strongly.  

It was... not so much flattering, as it was super creepy.  


The pitch was that he has a harp (which he insisted on showing me pictures of), and he writes songs, and he'd love to send me what he has for his latest song so far, and maybe I could help him write some lyrics.  About  me.  And just... no.

Do I know this guy?  Have I ever seen him before that he would find this a conversation that's reasonable to bring up out of literally nowhere?  Nope.

And thus, the whole rest of this day, I've been plagued with questions rattling around in my brain.  Questions for really anyone who will answer them.  Maybe that is you.  In fact, it could be you, if'n you just use that "Comment" link at the bottom of the post. 

Here's what I want to know, with my own answers 
(in case you were curious) underneath.

1.  What's your best story about getting hit on or hitting on someone?
Once an old man hit on me over the lunch counter at a bagel shop.  I don't feel bad calling him old because that was his pitch - he was looking for a younger girl who was lost in her faith (he asked me if I was Catholic and when I said I didn't practice, he looked like I just gave him a Christmas present), who he could "show the way."  And by way I think he meant kind of a line to his pants.  There was more than a creepy vibe coming off him. 

Let's be real - that any line from JGL would probs work.

2.  What's the best line you've heard/ used?
The best one ever used on me was in college when a gentleman who was *clearly* stoned out of his mind stated "Hey.  Hey.  Hey- if you were a booger, I would totally pick you first."  It did not work, but I did laugh so hard I cried.  Possibly right in his face.  But he was high enough I doubt he was offended.

3.  Are musicians hot to you?  (Or men in uniform, or some other sub-class categorized under your preferred gender?) Does it matter what they play?
I used to think musicians were the tops.  Not that musicians are worthless to me now,  but something about tonight's "Harpist" escapade struck me as... I guess just not the mental image a lady pictures when she hears "I'm a musician."  Drums? cool.  Guitar? not to shabby sir.  Trumpet? that's cool.  Harp/ Triangle/ Cowbell?  um... yeah. so there's that.

4.  If you find you are not at all attracted to your pursuant, how do you go about turning them down?
I find a way to show them my left hand with all it's blingy glory as forwardly as possible.  Apparently if you play a harp this is less than a deterant.  So then I have to say something to the effect of "I am uncomfortable with that.  No thank you."  Which of course makes me feel slightly rude when it really should be the other way around.


5.  And if you're the hitter-on-er, what have you done that's actually WORKED?
Honestly?  I don't think I've ever had the cajones to hit on someone.  I get that it takes a lot of guts, and they're guts I simply don't have.  SO mad props if you have the gumption to go for it.  I wish you luck.


Can't wait to read your comments!

8 comments:

Queen Holly the Magnificent said...

I think I have heard them all. "Hey, I like what you have going on," or "You go out much?" or the bland in your face, "Are you seeing anybody?"

I haven't got many weird ones. Although when I lived in the city I had a guy stop at the grocery store and try to hit on me, without getting out of his van. He just..stopped in the street. Needless to say I didn't give him the time of day.

Lisa said...

At SNC, a guy about a year older than we were spent 10 minutes telling me what an idiot I was for being an art major because I'll never be rich and closed it out by saying if I ever needed a nude model, I should give him a call. What an idiot.
--Lisa Lee-Oswald

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Kp said...

Drive by pick up. Niiiiiice.

OMG lisa. okay A that it hilarious, and B that made me think of the actual nude male model we had. Remember THAT dude? Maybe I should write a post about him. He was... well yeah.

Nicole said...

"I'm not saying you're stacked... But you remind me of a plate of pancakes... And I like pancakes."-- significantly older gentleman that just happened to be the hotel bartender and I was a customer. Real.

Nicole said...

"I'm not saying you're stacked... But you remind me of a plate of pancakes... And I like pancakes."-- significantly older gentleman that just happened to be the hotel bartender and I was a customer. Real.

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