Sunday, May 27, 2012

Intended super long post


I spent most of today's drive (roughly from Dallas, TX to Carbondale, IL) drafting up a blog post in my head.  And then I got here and I'm exhausted and hearing Mac snoring under the covers next to me is making me even more tired, so here's what I've ended up with for today:

1.  Mac's doing swell, thank you for asking (I think everyone I've talked to today has asked how he is).  The last 50 miles or so of the car ride today he was getting antsy, so I opened the window for him.  50 miles of sticking his head out the window was a euphoric experience for him, he's all puppy smiles.

2.  Bubba's less well, but still doing alright.  He's been refusing to drink much water, so we had a brief scare at a rest stop in Arkansas where he started panting and I got very concerned about dehydration/ overheating.  You can make a dog drink by simply holding the bowl of water at their snout level.  Wanna know how you make a cat drink water?  You dunk them in water, and they drink what they lick back off of themselves.  So just in case you didn't connect the dots, Bubs is super mad at me for pouring a bottle of water on him.  There may have been hissing involved.  It was a rough day for the gato.

3.  Best  Most interesting road sign I saw today:
"Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you beat him with a rod, he  you will save his soul from hell."

Now, I will be the first person to tell you that I was spanked as a kid, and I totally deserved it (I once bit my mother.  On the butt.  In the middle of a grocery store).  But this billboard... there was NO context.  It was just the "beat your child" bible quote, and then a church's URL listed underneath.  So... awesome.  Way to spread that message.

4.  I'm starting to believe that literally no one else is capable of driving like "not a giant bag of on-fire poop" except for me.
Seriously though.  if you're going to cut someone off so you don't have to turn off your cruise control when you get stuck behind a semi, thus making that other car slam on their brakes and/or swerve off the road... at least give me the .5 second warning of a damn blinker.  Next time, 
I will murder you in your FACE, stupid FIB  (oh yes, it was totally a FIB.  If you don't know what a FIB is... that's a post for another time.  Or find a friend from Wisconsin and ask.  They'll know.)

In related news:  I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY PUT YOUR DAMN PHONE DOWN YOU CAN WAIT TO TEXT YOUR BFF UNTIL LATER YOU STUPID STUPID VAPID TEENAGERS.

5.  The people in the hotel room next to ours are clearly a very... amorous couple.  Mac is concerned about the noises.  I wonder when they will be concerned about the noise of a large growling dog coming through their wall.  Hmm.

3 comments:

Jilly said...

I'm not sure which rod I laughed about more... the one referenced on the billboard or the one in the hotel room next to you....

AJ Hauser said...

I had to Google "amorous ". Good word.

Kp said...

Oh. oh the Amorous couple had a round two. And woke Mac up. Which had them calling the front desk because of the noises coming from my side of the wall (a whole lot of loud grumble cake growling) and then I explained WHY he was growling to the front desk lady and... oh it was ridiculous.