Friday, February 11, 2011

Gratuitous Product Placement


Aaaaand, I'm sick.
I work with students. Do you work with students? Because if you do, I think you see where this is going.
It is inevitable that a few times a year, you will catch whatever plague your students have incubated to deathly perfection in their anxiety-ridden, sleep deprived bodies. So when all three of my lead students checked into my office coughing and sneezing two days ago, I knew it was only a matter of time.
"Seroiusly, why are you here?! Go. Home." I squawked at them. Really, if you have a hard time walking three steps without either hacking up a lung or sneezing so hard you feel like your eyes might explode, what could you possibly have going on that you couldn't sequester yourself for at least a day to try and keep the infection quarantined/ recover?! But common sense like this is something that students develop during their time at College, so it never surprises me that laying low doesn't occur to them.
Nevertheless, I shoo them out, urge them to go home and go to bed, and then use five or six generous squirts of hand sanitizer while crossing my fingers that maybe, this time.
Cue two days later (today).
I had a tickle in my throat last night that wouldn't go away. I had to sleep propped up and full of NyQuil, and I still managed to wake myself up coughing a few times. When my alarm sounded, I spent a few moments curled into a little coughing ball before I could coordinate myself enough to hit "snooze."
So naturally, I dug out a pair of gray pants, a polo and a red sweater, and trudged up the hill to work, in order to busy myself with some projects, e-mails, meetings... oh, and coughing up my lungs.
(to be fair, I don't cough into my fist, I cough into my elbow like all the crazy health PSAs have been showing us since H1N1 broke out last year. But that looked weird when I tried to draw it.)
I made it all the way to 2:30. Just enough time to make sure my desk, keyboard and the small conference room were covered head to toe in germs. Oh, and to make sure that the seemingly healthy students I met with today will not be such in a few days time. Which was kindly, gently pointed out to me by my coworker:
Role modeling effective life-skills for my student staff. That's what I do. ...Oops.
So I trudged back down the hill, chest seizing up with the cold, and upon walking in the door, immediately became giddy that I could take a bath and make use of two excellent products, which I will share with you now.
First and foremost, this bath salt. It smells like Vicks Vapor Rub and has about the same effect. Which was helpful in letting me expand my lungs a bit. So when you need the opportunity to breathe in those fumes for a few hours, you turn to my second endorsement of the evening. The handheld electronic solitaire game.
It was nice, I got super prune-tastic, and now I'm parked on the couch next to a humidifier and a box of kleenex. Maybe tomorrow I'll actually take my own advice and get some rest.

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